Dad at night thats when my brain works over-time, i am finding this so hard, i know your watching and shaking your head at me because this isnt what you wanted me to do, but i am so sorry i cant be as strong as you want me to be. I am never washing my new top again, it has your smell, i wont wear it again, i need you. I am still your little girl, i will always love you, god this is so difficult, i dont know what to do, every minute that passes by is one minute less so we are together again, but i dont want to wait that long, i know i need to be with Bernard and the girls, but i just want to be with you, its Adrienne's birthday soon and you will miss it, i dont know how to handle all these emotions, i am totally at a lose, if i clean the house, it gets done and then i still think about you, if i stay in bed i still think of you, i just want to curl up and sleep until you come back for me, Dad your my best mate, we had a great time, i loved getting cuddles from you even though i am 36...still a daddies girl eh dad. maybe one day things can get back to some slight normality. but i dont know when, everyone needs to be patient with me and my emotions, how long will this pain last?